Lost in this World

Why is it so hard to take your own advice? Whenever my friends have problems, I can always find the perfect words and suggestions for them. I told them they can do it. They can do anything if they put their heart into it. They can get over this. They can surpass this. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. It will get better. But I myself don't believe in myself. I don't know if I can do it. I don't know if there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I don't know if I'm making the right decisions. I don't know if I'm wasting my life away. I don't know what to do. I don't know if I can be strong and brave enough for what's coming. I feel like I am a failure and useless but I know in reality, I am not a failure. I'm just another human being stuck in difficult times. I am just lost and don't know what to do or where to go. I know that it will get better but my fears and anxiety tells me I wont make it out alive. From the outside, people would think that I don't have any problems because I should know better. Psychology is my field. I'm always talking about how people should talk about their problems to others but here I am, talking to myself on a blog that no one would probably read.

When The Silence Gets Too Loud

You know something is wrong when you loose interest in the things that you enjoy doing. 

When you wake up not wanting to eat but your stomach is growling.

When you wake up feeling sad and you just want to close your eyes forever.

When you are tired but you can't sleep because your heartbeat is louder than the silence.

When you have free time but don't know what to do with life. 

When you miss everyone and yearn for the past. 

You know something is wrong but you keep on moving. Keep on going 

Hide

No words can describe what I am feeling now.

Because even if the truth is out in the open,

Nothing will change.

Two Sides of the World's Beauty

We live in a magical world where miracles exist.

Only the optimistic will see the magic hidden through the mist.

Through the optimistic eyes, the world is vivid and colorful.

Glistening in the little girl's eyes, was a world painted in rainbows.

We live in a dark world, where miracles do not exist.

Only the pessimistic will see the dark magic hidden through the mist.

Through a hopeless soul, the world is black and white.

Glistening in the little girl's eyes, was a tear of fright.

We live in a world, where only some people can see the magic.

Where miracles do not exist to people who don't believe.

- Misa D.

The Ocean Sway

The tide swept her towards him

He is her Earth

and she is his Water.

Together, they swallow the world.

- Misa D.

They Are Humans. Not Robots.

Autistic people are humans. They all came to the world like any other living things. They have feelings just like all normal people. They are not robot who cannot express feelings, and just do whatever they are told. Society still perceive autistic people in a negative light...but what if its YOU who have an autistic child. You take him/her to a supermarket and everyone looks at you in a disgusted way because he/she looks abnormal then all the other kids. It happens all the time. People tend to only look at someone from the outside but never from the inside. Just because someone is smiling, does that mean he/she is happy? Just because someone is not smiling, does that mean he/she is not happy? Some autistic people have a hard time expressing their thoughts and feelings, so just because it is not shown, that does not mean that their emotions and feelings are invisible. Now, lets face it, even normal people can have a hard time expressing their feelings.. Every autistic people are different so just because you know someone...or just because you personally work with someone...it is unacceptable to generalize the whole autistic population as "one". They are all different. All unique in their own ways...just like all of us. We might not think much of ourselves, but believe me, you guys are all unique in your own ways...and of course "unique" isn't just a word for normal people...it's a word for all! Normal is just a title..a label. Being normal does not make us perfect or the best...so why do people look down on autistic people so much? 

Who is to say that autistic people cannot be in a romantic relationship or be in love? Apparently, there are some autistic people out there who are married with kids. I believe that everyone can learn to accept something new as long as they have the mind and heart to understand another person's perspective. It's not the matter of fact that AUTISTIC PEOPLE are incapable of falling in love, it's the fact that normal people like us don't give these people a chance at all. As a society, we all still have a lot to learn...until we walk in someone else's shoe...until it hit close to home...until then, do society care.

To the people who object of disable people and normal people relationship...I understand your perspective too. You might have your own reasons, but to not give someone a chance to show you who they really are is very sad...walk in their shoes, and tell me how it feels. Do not feel like I am saying you are a bad person. You are not a bad person. You just need to learn to accept.. and understand.. 

Give Me Flowers

When the heart is still beating, not a single flower bouquet is receive.

When the heart is no longer beating, many flower bouquet is on the grave.

When the heart is still beating, not a single person care.

When the heart is no longer beating, people show up at the funeral.

Not just one, but many. Families. High school mates. College friends. Teachers.

Instead, give me flowers, when I am still here

As the flowers, brings a smile to my ear.

I cannot assure you that I will be there to see the flowers on my grave.

So instead, give me flowers, when I am still here.

- Misa D.

Salt on the Wound

 

 

Living under the oppression of a dysfunctional bull crap

Where the truth is hidden and the lies unwrap

There are eyes on the wall, and ears on the door

If you dare to speak up, there will be world war

Your misery is your fault, like salt sprinkle on your wounds

Your scars are permanent, and your heart beats without a tune

People only look at you from the outside, but they don't read your feelings

Are all humans like that? Judging the book without reading

They skim the book, as if they knew all the facts

But what do they know? Nothing, but just bull crap

- Misa D.

Light Up September

As some of you might know, I am a big supporter for childhood cancer. September is Childhood Cancer Awareness month and I am motivated to reach out to places that can light up their building gold. Back in June, I specifically chose to reach out to Tropicana Las Vegas because they have previously partnered with Susan G. Komen to light up their building pink for breast cancer awareness. In hope of a chance that they will light their building gold for childhood cancer, I sent them an email. Unfortunately, this is what I received. I do understand why this particular event cannot be carry out easily, but at the same time, I feel like childhood cancer has been thrown into a waste bin...as if it is not as important as breast cancer. Or perhaps, they will not take a young college student's word seriously..or because I am not a big organization, I am just one person. Myself. But I do appreciate the postcard.

"Thank You for your interest in Tropicana Las Vegas. We feel very strongly about contributing to our community, charitable organizations, and non-profits groups. Each year we show our support by designating time, creating events, allocating funds and more. Unfortunately, due to the tremendous volume of requests, we are unable to facilitate them all.

We regret to inform you that we cannot accommodate your request at this time but welcome additional interest in the future. We wish you every success in your endeavor and thank you for reaching out.

Sincerely,
Tropicana Las Vegas"

Balance

The law is blind where the victims get no justice,

and the criminal flee away without punishment.

The media played us, the law played us

They are not going to kneel down for an apology

Instead, they will point at us and laugh

Because they got away with their crimes.

The cries of the victims, the smirk of the criminal

The media that played with our emotions,

The law that is blind.

Oh, they are pointing at us, smirking.

- Misa D.